Desert Oasis
Joshua Tree, 2008

We hike through rock formations, the sun and heat lapping at us.  I carry my orange umbrella.  Arrive at the oasis, where I had last been many years ago.  The lush palm trees and vegetation have not changed.  My sister and her partner explore the area, yet I prefer to take in the land, through my body.  I look around and find a flat open area between two palm trees.  I check for anything living.  The concentration of life here is such that I don’t want to share my sleeping space.  Seemingly alone, I curl up on the rocks and dirt.  I am able to sleep anywhere now, not feeling a difference between rock and a bed.  I watch birds in the palms above me.  Crickets scream and lament.  I am in one of the moments of stillness that I so crave.  I feel myself drifting off.  Everything is where it needs to be in my life.  I fall into myself.

My sister intakes her breath so loudly that it’s almost a scream, a hushed scream. 
“I almost stepped on it.”
The “it” being
a curled up rattle snake
sleeping a few feet away
from my sleeping body. 

Was it there all along? 
Did I really curl up and fall into sleep
next to a sleeping snake?

 

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