Flashing Numbers


Numbers have always been speaking to me
Although speaking a language
That I’m just now
Starting to learn

I’d wake at 2:22
Or perhaps 3:33
Or 4:44
Then 34 joined in

Whenever I’d look at a clock
It would be at the moment
When the minutes reached 34

For years
For decades
Until I finally concluded I’d die at 34
My grandfather had predicted his own death several times
Walked away a few times alive
But died the last time
Perhaps numbers spoke to him as well

But I pass the 34 mark
Alive in my physical body
Although that is the year
That countless realities die within me
And I awaken more fully
Into who I am

The number five has always been a friend
As a child
When I felt myself lost
I could count letters into batches of five
The counting calmed me

Meditation is our key
I hear that over and over
Yet my body battles it
Anything but meditation screams something within me
That still wants to live

So I break the meditation into five’s
I sit and count
To five
Can I sit longer?
Can I get to ten?
If not, I take a break
Return later in the day
See if I can get to fifteen
My goal?  100 conscious breaths in a day.

Anyone can do it
It’s a start
It’s a taste of the calmness awaiting
And you never know
Who will speak to you
Within that calmness.

***********************************************************************************************************************************
All images and writing are copyrighted.  These stories will be published by 2012.
Printed version available upon request.
All feedback and comments are welcome.  Please send to blissmeander at gmail.com